Here’s the official word from my mom.
Harvey Chua firstname.lastname@example.org writes:
You will have plenty of time for a love life later on. For now, concentrate on your studies. But then, it’s your choice. I can’t be watching you all the time, so you would have to watch yourself and decide which or who(m) are your priorities. Just remember that there are rewards, repercussions or complications – depending on what actions or decisions you make. Judge well what is good for you.
Love you always,
P.S. See, you do have a love life. We all love you. I more than and
ahead of anybody and everybody else.
So, here are my priorities as of 20030113, not necessarily in order:
- Get a PhD. The training will help me do research, and I’ll be able to pick up useful teaching techniques along the way.
- Teach computer science. I really, really like computer science, and I want to help other people realize how fun and helpful it is.
- Help people grow and reach their potential. (That includes helping myself grow. =) ) Still have to figure out how to help people do that.
I’m not completely devoted to this plan, and by that I mean that I understand that I am not absolutely essential to the progress and development of computer science. Still, I really like the field, and as one of those rare girls who actually enjoy computer science, I feel I have an opportunity to make a big difference. =)
I don’t think I want to have to deal with the possible complications of “being in luuuuuurv” until I’ve earned my PhD and have established a name for myself. So that pretty much rules out formal, long-term, conventional romantic relationships (eeeeew! ) for a long time. I suppose that should postpone all dilemmas until after I finish graduate school, by which time I should have a better understanding of all of this.
This does not, however, prevent me from appreciating the friends I have. I know that really good friendships help me grow as a person and achieve my dreams, and indeed the warmth and support I receive from my family and friends is something I treasure.
And it really is rather nice to interact with people. I think I have recently figured out how to get around my occasional
spells of antisocial-ness. It seems to be simply a matter of practice and will, and I must give credit to some friends who don’t know that they helped me figure it out.
There is something to be said about love and growth, if my Philosophy and Theology classes have any truth to them. I also have to watch out – might become _too_ rational or need too much control over my life. ;) Like for example, I have a bit of a hang-up regarding the word “love”, since it can mean quite different things to people, and I’m a little afraid of becoming incontinent as defined by Aristotle. (See? I get to use Philo after all.) Distraction is doubleplus ungood, but so is neurosis.
I love computer science not just because of the abstract algorithms and programs, but more because of the people I get to meet and help and learn from. So I’m into this whole social thing, but I’m just taking things a little at a time. Kinda like the spiral model of software development. ;)
I’m sure we’ll all manage to figure something out. =) So basically, people know my plans. If you think that you can help me become a better person and that I can help you become a better person, then we’ll see how things work out.
This is published for future reference, since it’s nice to have more information. =)