I'm getting a better idea of the work I enjoy doing. Here's a rough sketch:

• I love sharing what I'm passionate about, helping people learn more and become more effective, and encouraging people to grow. In my current role, I get to do plenty of presenting, conducting workshops, coaching, and writing. People appreciate not only the information I share but also the enthusiasm with which I share it and the thoughtfulness with which I help people learn.
• I love learning about all sorts of things. I'm currently working on visual literacy, and I'm looking forward to using the Cintiq tablet to experiment with graphics even more. I also love learning about social networking, communication skills, and other topics that I can share with people around me.
• I love connecting people with other people, ideas, or tools. It gives me a thrill whenever I can introduce people to just the right person who can help them do what they want, to a book or article that fits their interests, or to a tool they'll love.
• I love exercising my creativity and helping people brainstorm. As part of my work, I often get to help people brainstorm Web 2.0 business ideas, and I really enjoy bringing in things I've learned from all the different aspects of my life.
• I enjoy working on lightweight projects based on open source technologies with vibrant user communities. I get to do this with my Drupal-based project and with my Emacs book. I love being able to read source code and learn from other people's contributions. I love sharing tips on my blog and learning more from others. I love giving back to the community, too!
• I can write technical documentation better than most developers can. And I don't mind doing it, too, as long as it doesn't require me to keep changing applications or operating systems.
• I don't like working on front-end interfaces, such as designing graphics, writing CSS, or trying to make a page look exactly like the design. I can do it, but I'd rather do a simple design.
• I really don't like working on cross-browser or cross-platform issues.
• I really don't like dealing with inconsistent, fiddly, or frustrating things such as bugs in one's operating system (really, my mouse should Just Work) or convoluted administrative paperwork. Some people enjoy solving problems like that. I don't.

I'd like to explore sales at some point, too. I want to find out if it might be a good fit for me, too, and I like the idea of helping people find the right solution for them.

So that's a general idea of my strengths. I love helping people be more effective, whether it's by sharing ideas or tips, connecting them with others, or building or tweaking tools for them. I enjoy software development and technical writing too, but mainly as a way of supporting my ability to help people be more effective. Those are the "whats," at least right now. What about the hows?

I don't see myself working on projects with unrealistic time expectations. I don't see myself sacrificing life for work or for career advancement. If I did, I'd be going up the ladder, yes, but it might be the wrong ladder for me.

The things I love doing and the things that make me special all require me to be happy and passionate about my work. I believe that I can be successful at them while living according to my values. I'm looking forward to seeing the kind of life I can build. =)

Have you thought about your whats and hows?

This week gave me an opportunity to think about time, work, and money.

I had spent much of Sunday and my evenings on conference-related work. As much as I enjoyed the opportunity to reach out and touch people I wouldn't ordinarily get to meet, I also realized that it was time I took away from my personal projects and my other relationships. By the time the conference wrapped up on Wednesday, I was looking forward to a quiet day working at home.

Although I'd already worked the typical number of hours for the week, I still felt that I needed to keep working on Thursday and Friday. I wanted to make some more progress on my main billable project, and I was also helping a number of volunteer efforts get off the ground. I put in a full day of work on Thursday, and I headed into the office on Friday.

After I did some more work on my main billable project, demonstrated some of our internal Web 2.0 tools, and replied to my e-mail, I looked into the process for filing overtime. I had given the company my personal time because the company wanted the value I could create, so I figured that I should be able to get some of that value back. I knew I could be compensated in either money or time, but I needed to do some paperwork.

Catching myself getting frustrated by the process for filing overtime, I decided to put off the paperwork until next week and enjoy some of the time that I had earned.

Don't get me wrong–I love the opportunities I have to grow and work with such wonderful people. I just want to make sure that I'm living the values that I want to live, because I won't be effective if I'm not authentic. This doesn't mean that I don't love my work. This means I love it enough to want to always love it, instead of coming to resent it or losing touch with myself.

During my commute back, I looked at the options of no overtime, overtime for money, overtime for time, and free overtime, thinking about their effects on my happiness, relationships, increased opportunities to help, career progress, and bank balance. This is the chart I sketched on the subway ride home.

VALUES: Personal happiness and relationships are very important to me. I enjoy opportunities to help, but I'm not too worried about it because there are more than enough awesome opportunities to reach out and make a difference, both inside and outside work. I think about but am not overly concerned with career growth, because that tends to follow opportunities to help. Money is flexible. I don't mind growing wealth and I'd like to share in the value I create, but because I enjoy being frugal and I don't have many financial demands, I'm not driven to earn more and more.

OPTIONS:

No overtime: If I try my best to stay within the 40-44 hours that forms a "typical" work week, I think this will have a terrific effect on my happiness and my relationships. I'll be able to explore other areas, exercise my creativity, and keep myself from going overboard. I'll miss out on some opportunities to help at work and my career won't progress as quickly as other people's might, but I'll have more opportunities to help outside work and those opportunities may turn into things that can make money for me, too. This doesn't stop me from volunteering on things I love about work during my free time (but only the things I love!). =) What will I do with the rest of the time? Experience new things, think, learn, write, dream, doodle, listen, share, grow…

Overtime compensated by money: Ideally it would be overtime for something I really enjoy and would be doing anyway, but even in that case, I'd still have to deal with the paperwork. Once I sort out the paperwork, though, this will be less stressful. (I should revise this chart after I complete the process a number of times.) On the downside, I might find myself doing overtime on things I don't particularly care about, in which case I'll probably feel the strain of not enough rest, reflection, or creative randomness. I may also end up finding it easier to focus on work than on relationships, so that's not too good either. In addition, money is flexible, but time is irreplaceable. On the upside, it'll open up more opportunities to help at work, it would be good for my career (particularly that utilization target), and it would grow my bank balance (well, after taxes). It's also a good way of making sure that I spend time on things that other people will find valuable.

Overtime compensated by time later on: This depends on the circumstances. I would need to fill out paperwork and coordinate with my team members, which will take effort. On the other hand, if this allows me to move time around so that I can have more chunks of free time, then that can work out well for personal happiness and relationships. If I can put in work when demand is high and take time for myself when demand is low, then my opportunities and career would probably be positively affected. On the other hand, there will probably always be demand, and it's hard to take a break when other people are working hard.

Free overtime: I can skip the paperwork, but that doesn't solve the problem of being more stressed because I give up time spent on rest, reflection, learning, or relationships. It's good for opportunities and career, and has a neutral effect on money.

SUMMARY: My intuition tells me that the no overtime case gets me closest to living my values without too much stress, and even if that might limit my career advancement, it opens so much more of life to me. Overtime for money and overtime for time are pretty much tied, but it'll be a moot point because overtime is going to be phased out for my job category next year. Free overtime is good for the company, but it doesn't help me confront and try to live my values, and it's too easy to get sucked into work.

I'm going to work on the paperwork so that I can get what I'm eligible for and so that I can understand the process. After that, I'll avoid working overtime unless the company really really needs it, and then I'll see if I can either take that as time off (preferably) or as money.

I think it's good to think out loud about things like this. I've learned more about my tradeoffs, and I'd love to hear your insights. If my employer disagrees with the way I currently think, I'd rather hear about it now (and maybe work out a different view?) than later. It doesn't mean that I don't love my work. Again: all this means I love it enough to want to always love it, instead of coming to resent it. I hope that by thinking about my values and decisions, I can make the fit better and better.

I've also submitted an application for an emergency visa applicant to the US consulate. There are couple of exciting work-related opportunities that I would love to be part of. I can't talk about them yet, but if they do go through, you'll know. It's a bit of a pain to not be able to travel freely, but hey, that's life!

I will fix that tomorrow. I hate being late. I hate being late more than I like staying up, so that should be easy.

After a morning of meetings, I was frustrated when I couldn't quite make progress on the market scan I needed to do for a team member. I just couldn't think of the right words that I could use to find news. I kept running into the same things I turned up during the previous market scan I did for the company. After a short chat with my team member, I tried reframing it from a market scan ("What are people out there doing in this space?") into a brainstorming session ("How can we make this better?"), and _then_ the ideas started flowing. Sometimes it's all about what question you ask.

I'm getting a little uncomfortable about one aspect, though. I don't think I have a good process yet for assembling a large variety of information. I need to do market scans and stay abreast of developments, and it's absolutely fantastic that there are blogs covering most of the areas I'm looking into. But I don't yet have a good way to organize this information so that I can see patterns and summarize them easily. Maybe a mindmap. http://freemind.sourceforge.net/wiki/index.php/Main_Page just released a new test version, and I'm looking forward to giving it a try.

I used another mind map on MindMeister to share my brainstorming with my team member. It was _fun_ thinking creatively, and I'm back to feeling a sense of centered-ness that I'd missed over the past few days. One of the things I'll need to practice is to build that time and space into my schedule, even if it means admitting that yes, I don't have spare cycles for something.

Now there's something important. It's not really saying, "No, I can't do that," just helping people see that it might take longer than expected. If I help adjust the level of expectations (or "level-setting" in businessese), then other people can plan more accurately around me. Again, this sense of how many 'cycles' I can spare is something I'll need to develop over time! <laugh> What would help?

• Seeing current projects and their timeframes
• Seeing how I've allocated my time over the next week
• Sharing my current projects (outcomes, impact, etc.)
• Managing from my calendar instead of my task list

Saying yes to everything is a quick way to burn out. I don't think I'm close to that yet, but it's good to practice managing people's expectations so that I'll be good at it when it really matters. Not that I'm going to waste any time, of course, but it's better to deliver more than expected than it is to deliver less.

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