This time from a watersports resort said to be the best in the world
for wakeboarding. I'll give it a shot, although I haven't worn my
swimsuit in ages…
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It's easier to drink plenty of water when you're sweating rivers of it. =)
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I'm quieter than I remembered, than I hoped. The stories I most want
to tell, the unbloggable things I still need to think through, I can't
share because my family isn't ready to listen instead of judge. I
can't think things through with them.
So I dodge the barbs, change the topics of conversation, downplay what
I feel. I'm sad, but not for reasons they think I am. I'm happy, but
not for reasons they know.
It'll be hard to learn how to trust them with this. I should talk to
them about it, perhaps. Tell them how I feel when they do what they
do, tell them that the consequences of their actions is that I am
discouraged from talking to them about stuff like that, explore more
constructive ways of interacting. I'll try that. I want more than what
we have now.
They are still human and still learning, and I am still human and
still learning.
When you realize that this is true for everyone and everything, it
becomes a little easier to practice loving kindness. It is still hard,
but it becomes a little easier.
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My wallet exists somewhere in my suite. I know because I had to take
my room key out of it in order to get in.
I opened the door, put the key into my bag, took off my shoes, and
dropped all of my stuff on my bed. I then charged my iPod, phone, and
laptop, cleaned out the fridge and freezer, and packed last-minute stuff.
It's not in my backpack or purse, where I'd logically put it if I were
paying attention.
I think I'll nap for twenty minutes. Maybe that will help.
Okay, here's what I need to do.
I really want to spend some quality time with my closest friends here,
but it might be difficult to do that and still keep the sense of
abundance of time. I would *love* to meet all of them, give them an
extra extra extra big hug, tell them my favorite story of them from
the past year, and find out what they want to do with the next year. I
don't think I'll have the time to visit everyone personally (I'd like
to!), but I could call on Sunday (after dinner) or Monday (after packing).
Priority packing list:
Sounds like a Plan…
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<stretch>
Halfway through my US/Canada 2006 letters. I'm limiting myself to 100
letters for now, although I *might* send more from the Philippines if
I feel particularly diligent. Of the 100 on my must-write list, there
are 32 people in Canada. Come to think of it, that's actually pretty
interesting. It's only been a year and a half…
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I grew up with books and audiotapes of Tom Peters, Zig Ziglar, and Tom
Hopkins. I can *still* hear Tom Hopkins say “Unbelievable!” in my
head. Not because I was unbelievably precocious when I was young, but
because my mom was always, always, *always* learning about sales and
management and whatever she needed to learn in order to help my dad
and my sisters and me succeed. Being an indiscriminate bookworm who'd
happily read anything on the shelves (and quite a few books that
weren't), I quickly chewed through her business books, her
interpersonal books, her writing books, her parenting books…There
was so much to learn, and it was always so much fun!
My parents often scolded me for taking books to breakfast, lunch, and
dinner. I would read while walking, while chatting, while waiting in
line; in bed, in the car, even in the shower sometimes… Looking
back, it seems as if I never looked up! Now I've realized that reading
was good but not as good as it could've been, though. Instead of
reading during meals, I should've been picking my parents' brains…
but I probably hadn't yet learned what questions to ask in order to
learn even more! =)
So if you think *I'm* interesting, you really have to meet my mom and
my dad. This process of constant improvement? It definitely comes from
them. The number of times I'd gone downstairs to check on my dad, only
to find him learning all sorts of new Photoshop tricks… The number
of books I've borrowed from my mother's bookshelf…
I have confidence that my life will unfold well. If I'm really,
really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really lucky,
I'll have the kind of partnership my mom and my dad have, and have the
kinds of close friendships my mom has.
I'm learning from the best.
(Hah! I blog something and within five minutes, my mom *blogs* a
response—a personal story she posted to an online forum before.
Blogs! Online forums! How cool is that? Now if only she allowed me to
link to her blog…)
E-Mail from Mama
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