Nightmares

I’m still a little sore from krav maga last Sunday. I don’t think it’s
just the strain, although I’ll stretch more and get used to the pain
of attacking or defending. I had a hard time sleeping last night, too.
A series of nightmares…

After learning a tiny fraction about defense against a knife, of
course my mind goes and constructs a knife attacker to see how that
might work. In my dream, I felt the fight-or-flight response (and
definitely leaned toward flight!). The strange thing was that it
didn’t stop there… Rather, I ended up flashing back to the last time
I felt a really strong fight-or-flight response, which had nothing to
do with knives and everything to do with overhearing my name in
conversation. That really sucked; I just couldn’t stop my heart from
racing.

And then I ended up dreaming someone I know was really really sad, and
I just couldn’t figure out how to explain things to cheer her up, and
I just felt terrible.

So yeah, not quite restful sleep for me yesterday. Strange, isn’t it?
A knife grabs attention, but it’s worse to wake up and realizing that
your phantasms are less obvious and more real.