I come up with way more ideas than I can work on, and that's okay. That's good. It means I can always skim the top for interesting things, and it's fine if things overflow as long as the important stuff stays in the funnel. I'm experimenting with more ways to keep things flowing.

I usually come up with lots of ideas and then revisit my priorities to see if I can figure out 1-3 things I'd like to work on for my next focused time sessions. These priorities are actually pretty stable for the most part, but sometimes an idea jumps the queue and that's okay.

There's a loose net of projects/tasks that I'm currently working on and things I'm currently interested in, so I want to connect ideas and resources to those if I can. If they aren't connected, or if they're low-priority and I probably won't get to them any time soon, it can make a lot of sense to add quick notes and pass it along.

For things I want to think about some more, my audio braindumping workflow seems to be working out as a way to capture lots of text even when I'm away from my computer. I also have a bit more time to sketch while waiting for the kiddo to get ready for bed. I can use the sketchnotes as outlines to talk through while I braindump, and I can take my braindumps and distill them into sketches. Then I can take those and put them into blog posts. Instead of getting tempted to add more and more to a blog post (just one more idea, really!), I can try wrapping up earlier since I can always add a follow-up post. For some things, making a video might be worthwhile, so smoothing out my workflow for creating a video could be useful. I don't want to spend a lot of time filing but I still want to be able to find related notes, so automatically refiling based on tags (or possibly suggesting refile targets based on vector similarity?) might help me shift things out of my inbox.

I'm generally not bothered by the waste of coming up with ideas that I don't get around to, since it's more like daydreaming or fun. I sometimes get a little frustrated when I want to find an interesting resource I remember coming across some time ago and I can't find it with the words I'm looking for. Building more of a habit of capturing interesting resources in my Org files and using my own words in the notes will help while I wait for personal search engines to get better. I'm a little slow when it comes to e-mails because I tend to wait until I'm at my computer–and then when I'm at my computer, I prefer to tinker or write. I occasionally redo things because I didn't have notes from the previous solution or I couldn't find my notes. That's fine too. I can get better at taking notes and finding them.

So I think some next steps for me are:

• Post more toots on @sachac@emacs.ch; might be useful as a firehose for ideas. Share them back to my Org file so I have a link to the discussion (if any). Could be a quick way to see if anyone already knows of related packages/code or if anyone might have the same itch.
• See if I can improve my braindumping/sketch workflow so that I can flesh out more ideas
• Tweak my video process gradually so that I can include more screenshots and maybe eventually longer explanations

One way to look for ways to improve is to think about where the waste might be. I wanted to reflect on how I'm currently doing things and where I might be wasting effort.

• Not noticing an opportunity: There's not noticing that there's an opportunity to improve or not seeing that something that I can do that takes advantages of something I'm already doing.
• Working on the wrong thing: If I pick something less effective to work on, I waste a little opportunity. Something might be a bad fit if it bumps into my weaknesses or doesn't take advantage of my strengths. Maybe I'm picking the wrong problem to work on, or I'm taking the wrong approach, or I haven't prepared, or I'm working on something that may be high effort and low reward. It's usually not a big deal, but it helps to think a little bit about which tasks can lead to compounding benefits and which are one-offs that don't help as much.
• Working at the wrong time: I feel a little slower working on something when I'm not in the right mindset or I'm not as interested in it as in other things I could be doing. It's also tough when I don't have enough energy to work on things. It's important to notice when I'm getting into the negative productivity zone, especially when coding. If I pick the wrong time to work on something, I might have to deal with lots of interruptions or distractions.
• Context-switching: Context-switching is a particularly big challenge for me because I'm basically working with one to two hour chunks possibly separated by days or months. For example, if I start something on Tuesday and then I pick it up again on Friday, I need to do a fair bit of rethinking and remembering. Switching from one thing to another is hard. I'm always looking up how to do something in the specific language that I need to work with. It's related to the problem of…
• Duplicate research: Sometimes I have to reread the resources that would help me prepare for that task.
• Tunnel vision: On the flip side, focusing too much on one project means not thinking about other things. Everything else tends to be in the back burner because of context switching costs, and that sometimes leads to…
• Letting an opportunity lapse: Sometimes it's too late to get the most out of something because a person who wanted it has moved on (including me) or because I'd completely forgotten the context of my notes. This also applies to real life, too. A- is not going to want to hang out with me forever, so I should make the most of it. =)
• Forgetting the context: Quick notes are sometimes too quick.
• Fragmented time: Since I need to work in short bursts, I have to get to a good stopping point. That can be tough.
• Frittering away time on distractions: It can also be tough working on something that doesn't fit into five minutes here, five minutes there. There's a big temptation to fritter time away on distractions like scrolling through Reddit, or just working on small, easy stuff instead of thinking about the harder problems.
• Repetitive steps that could be automated: Waste could also be working on things that the computer could be working on instead.
• Not making the most of it: If I'm not paying attention, I might not get as much out of an experience or task as I could have.
• Not harvesting notes/code: It's very tempting sometimes to try to work quickly and just solve the problem for today. But if I take a little bit of extra time to harvest my notes from it, then I might be able to solve that problem when I run into the same problem, six months later or something like that.
• Doing more than needed: The principle of You Ain't Gonna Need It often comes into play here, especially if I need to squeeze things down to fit into the chunks of time I have.
• Missing pieces, incomplete notes: If I write something incomplete, I might have to redo more of it when I want to reuse it or build on it.
• Forgetting where to find something: If I can't even remember the keywords needed to find something, that's even more of a waste of good notes.
• Mistakes: Mistakes happen, and that's another source of wasted effort. If I'm in a rush or if I'm being impatient, I am not very good at paying attention to details. Then, when I need to go back and fix things, I have to deal with the context-switching all over again.
• Doing things that might be a better fit for other people: So if there's something that can be done by somebody who's more detail-oriented or who has more time to look at all the small things or who has those particular skills or interests, it's better for them to do it. Then I can focus on the stuff that fits me.
• Limits of tools: If I'm coding, doing it on my laptop with maybe two side-by-side windows is not quite as effective as plugging into the external monitor and getting all the things set up so I can see things instead of switching between overlapping things.
• Having things in a form that's hard to search or skim: Videos and sketches can be hard to search or skim, so sometimes it makes sense to go back and actually write the text for it.
• Negative feelings: For example, if the kiddo really wants my attention and I'm trying to complete a thought, it's tough not to get frustrated by the interruptions. It helps to be able to pull myself back and actually focus on her because there's no getting around that anyway, and then to do my thing later. It's also good to not let that frustration linger, because then that gets in the way of both enjoying her company and being able to focus on my own thing afterwards.

Now to think a little more closely about my main challenges…

Dealing with the fragmentation of my time is a big challenge. The way that I might do that is by grouping tasks together, so I don't have to switch context so much. Tunnel vision hasn't been too much of a problem for me so far, although it does mean that some things don't get worked on for a long time.

Taking a little bit of extra time to write up my notes makes sense, although it means my chunks of coding time have to be even shorter. Extracting excerpts for literate programming posts is a bit tough if I need to think about how to provide enough context. Maybe I should let myself fill things in later. I'm also looking into ways to do that faster, like maybe auto-generated captions running in the background so I can think out loud, grab the transcript, and then edit it a little bit (like this post). We'll see how that goes.

It makes sense to invest some time into expanding my toolset, like learning more about my tools, automating things, or taking advantage of hardware or software.

Of course, I'm still probably going to run into mistakes along the way, but if I can figure out which things are not as good for me, then I can see if other people want to go pick them up.

Might be a reasonable plan for reducing waste. Let's see how it works out.

After A- headed out the door with the babysitter, I resisted the urge to work on consulting projects and picked a few personal projects instead. I organized and published another Emacs News post, then settled in for some coding.

I made good progress on using Puppeteer to automate renewing my library books. I even packaged it up as a Docker image, pushed it to my Linode server, and successfully ran it there. Hooray! That means we’re one step closer to getting A- her own library card, since I’ll be able to renew items on both of our cards without the hassle of logging in and out of various accounts on my phone.

So far, so good. The ROI doesn’t make straightforward sense – I wouldn’t each up enough overdue fines to balance the opportunity cost from not consulting – but learning how to automate headless browsers will open up a lot more web automation possibilities, and extra practice wrapping it in a Docker container was a nice bonus. And yeah, turning three minutes of mild annoyance every few days or so into something more automated will probably be worthwhile. The next steps are for me to turn it into a cronjob so that my server can run it daily, and to test to make sure it works when a book can’t be renewed.

I also wanted to prepare for doing Emacs Hangouts again. It turns out that my Logitech H800 Bluetooth headset microphone doesn’t work properly on Ubuntu Bionic. Something about HFP and PulseAudio. At least audio output works, so that will reduce the feedback. I just finished apt-get dist-upgrade when A- returned with the babysitter, so I’ll work on this again next time.

Alternating consulting sessions with personal projects seems like a good plan. It feels a little indulgent, but so did my experiment with semi-retirement when I was just starting, and that worked out really well for us.

This babysitting setup seems to work well for us considering A-‘s late schedule and shifting interests. A 5-hour session gives me enough time to dig into a challenge or learn a new skill. A- seems to need more connection time after babysitting (probably letting off the tension from behaving so well with a new person all afternoon), but that’s perfectly okay.

I’ve liked spending all this time with A-, and I like the little stories I pick up from watching her learn every day. At the playground, she was so proud of being able to climb over the top of the climbing structure by herself. But these moments belong to her, not to me, so it’s okay for me to step back and have my own moments. Part of her journey as a child is separating herself from me, and part of my journey as a parent is separating myself from her.

Slowly, slowly, slowly making time for my own things again!

Update 12:39 AM: It looks like Bluetooth headset microphones are not really working on Linux these days, so I’ll just use the headset to listen in order to reduce feedback, and I’ll use my Yeti microphone if I set up for an Emacs Hangout or Emacs Chat session.

It feels like I've had much less focused time over the past two months. Weaning, sickness, and A-‘s bigger emotions all needed more patience and energy. I've been prioritizing sleep and household maintenance over things like staying up to consult or write. On the plus side, we've gotten back into the rhythm of preparing meals for the week, and cleaning the house is a little easier now.

How can I adapt if this is my new normal?

I've been setting more firm boundaries (myself, bedtime routines, etc.), and that's been working reasonably well. I've also adjusted my plans and made sure not to commit to more consulting than I could do.

I'm not keen on making videos a regular part of her day, since we don't want to add another cause for conflict. I considered creating space by having a babysitter come over for 3-4 hours. A- is still not keen on the idea, though, and I can see how we both benefit from the time we spend with each other.

So the main thing to do, I think, is to rejig my plans in order to make the most of the constraints. What do I want to learn even without lots of focused sit-down time? How do I want to grow?

• Equanimity: This lets me turn A-‘s tantrums into learning opportunities. I can practise appreciating her and this life, especially when we're in the thick of things. Taking care of our basic needs gives me the space to be patient and kind when A- needs me to be, and it's good practice in anticipating and heading off challenges. I tend to be firmer than W- is, so I can work on noticing when a little kindness or flexibility might help a lot when A- and I are on our own.
• Household maintenance: I want to take on more chores, help A- get involved, and become more effective. This is also a good opportunity to practise noticing things. I can learn things from W- and from the Internet.
• Thinking, learning, and improving in short bursts: I want to get better at using little pockets of time. Drawing and dictating might be good techniques to explore further.
• Mindfulness and being present: I want to get better at being there for A- instead of letting myself be distracted. I want to get better at enjoying now. I also want to balance that with thinking about and doing my own things. I can start with a few magic moments a day, and then expand from there.
• Playfulness and creativity: I like the way W- interacts with A-. It might be interesting to practise playfulness and creativity, especially since A- can be my play partner and guide. I can pick up ideas at the drop-in centres, and sometimes reading helps.

These things are less obviously rewarding than, say, figuring out a clever solution for a client problem or coming up with a neat Emacs hack and blogging about it. But they're worthwhile things to learn anyway.

How can I make my learning more intentional? It might be interesting to make myself a list of things to focus on or try out, and then try one at time while keeping an eye out for other things that are relevant to the situation. For example, I could have a day of involving A-‘s toys in tasks, then see how that resonates with A-.

How can I make my learning more visible? I think journal entries will help a little. Sometimes A- insists that I stay close while she's sleeping, so that might be a good time to write. I can draw thoughts while waiting for A-, too, which is a good way to model writing and drawing. Paper seems to work a little better than drawing on my phone, although maybe that's a matter of practice. I don't have a good workflow for dealing with notes yet, but I can archive pictures for now and deal with them as mostly transitory thinking aids.

I'll probably have lots of focused time later on. Crunch time isn't forever. Even if I may need to start over, I'm not too worried. I think I'll be able to get the hang of things again.

In the meantime, we're mostly set up for playing and doing chores at home. Once we recover from this cold and cough, I think our daily rhythm will involve drop-in centres as well as home time. I've got things to learn and ways to grow. I can do this, even though it's a bit different from what I'm used to.

Life changes. It's good to adapt.

We got the Thule Chariot XT bike trailer that also quickly converts into a stroller. Our goals are:

• Model physical activity, and biking in particular
• Explore more of the city
• Expand our range

We started by getting A- used to the stroller. She's generally amenable to it, and has asked for it when she's sleepy. She also likes insisting on walking or even pushing the stroller, saying “I want to exercise my body!” We totally support that, of course, so I don't insist on putting her back in.

This week, I tried biking. I rode the mountain bike by itself a few times around the block to get the hang of it, since the shifters and frame were different from the ones on my bike. Then we hitched up the bike trailer, and I rode around the neighbourhood a few more times. Then we did a test ride with A-.

I've been testing the bike trailer on short trips with A-. She's not always keen on it, which makes getting her into the trailer and on the way home sometimes a dicey prospect. If I don't have any time pressure and I make an effort to be extra-playful, though, I might be able to convince her to put on the helmet and get in the trailer. She responds better to play and energy than to collaborative problem-solving. Today, it helped to stick lots of stickers on the helmet and to pretend to be getting ready for airplane take off.

I'd like to practise with short trips to playgrounds that she might likes. Maybe High Park, Vermont Square Park, and Dufferin Grove. Those are well-served by public transit in case I need to bail. Worst-case scenario, I can probably lock the bike up somewhere, take a picture and send the location to W-, and he can retrieve it. I'd rather avoid that, though.

I think it might be good to experiment with keeping things low-pressure.

• I'll take transit for classes, appointments, and other things I need to get to or leave in a fairly predictable manner. Even then, I'll give people a heads-up that stuff might happen, and I'll keep an oops fund in case I need to pay for last-minute cancellations or cab fares.
• I won't let any embarrassment about running late get in my way.
• When making plans with friends, I'll give them a heads-up, and I'll trust in their being grown-ups who can replan or find something that works for them.
• A- tends to stay at a park a long time once we get there, so maybe I can ping people once we arrive and then see if they want to meet up. I should wrap up a few hours before sunset, too, just in case.
• Speaking of trust, I'll also trust that people can make their own decisions about whether they want to hang out with us in a playground (with bubbles! and snacks!). I've been a little uncertain about hanging out with non-parent friends because of the stereotype of a kid-obsessed parent who can't talk about much else, but parks can be nice to enjoy anyway, I'm starting to free up some coding and thinking time, and maybe people might want to hang out with kids because it's rejuvenating.

Biking opens up exciting possibilities. I don't have to make it pay off entirely this year, or even worry about the break-even point compared to transit. I think a different experience of Toronto might be well worth it. It's also good practice in adapting to situations and getting better at being playful. Looking forward to getting out more!

Okay. I've gotten basic recording sorted out, I think. I can capture quick notes, photos, and videos to document our lives and serve as placeholders for further reflection. I can organize them into rough categories. Babysitting gives me enough brainspace for both consulting and self-improvement. My sleep is still a bit messy, but that's probably at least half because of me. I'm confident about spending time with A- and helping her learn stuff. Time to think of the next steps.

I think there are three big areas for me:

• planning and experimenting with potential improvements: needs attention, creativity, and implementation time
• sharing tweaks and things I've figured out: good for backing up and for conversation
• making sense of facts, asking questions, synthesizing, reflecting

Our continuous improvement capabilities are okay, although of course there's room to grow. Physical stuff (reorganization, trying stuff, decluttering) can happen throughout the day. Reading fits in late at night or in snippets throughout the day, although I'm still skimming for things to think about instead of being able to take notes or think about things in depth. Coding tiny little tools fits in late at night or during babysitting sessions – not big projects yet, but shell scripts and short Emacs Lisp functions are quite doable.

I'd like to get better at circling back and posting source code and experiment notes. Maybe I'll start by including just a paragraph or two describing key motivation and intended result, then jump straight into the code or description. I'm not sure if it will help anyone else, but who knows? Besides, it's good to have stuff like that in my own archive.

It seems like such a splurge to use babysitting time for thinking, drawing, and writing. I don't know if I can write a post worth $120+ to myself or other people, and besides, I want to write more personally relevant things before I get back into sketchnoting books or putting together, say, Emacs guides. But if I think of the babysitting as primarily paying for A- to practise independence and social interaction with someone one-on-one, I do some consulting every week, and I make an effort to pick up one or two new activity ideas each time we have someone over, I can think of the discretionary time as a bonus instead of trying to optimize my use of that time.

Let me think about sense-making. I've been focusing on just capturing what was going on because it was hard to think more deeply. I'm a little less preoccupied now, so I have some brainspace for thinking. Some questions to ponder:

• What is A- interested in learning? What does she think? Why does she do what she does? How can I grow so that I can support her even more effectively?
• What else can I experiment with? How can I reduce waste or costs (including intangibles), and how can I increase benefits?
• How can I make learning visible for both A- and me?
• What do I want from all of this? How do I want this to shape me?

Writing this on a bench in the park, arms around a sleeping A-, I'm somewhat challenged by the small window I'm writing in (there's room for a couple of paragraphs and that's it), the inability to refer to other things side by side, and the possibility of interruption. But maybe I can think and write in medium-sized chunks: a little bigger than the quick notes I've been taking, but small enough that I don't need an outline or the ability to easily rearrange my text. I can write more stream-of-consciousness stuff instead of worrying about editing. I can give myself permission to cover ground relatedly instead of worrying whether I'd written about something before, or if I'd just dreamed it.

Let's warm up those thinking muscles. :)

Babysitting experiment #2 was also a success. A- had her heart set on making carrot muffins today. She was peeling carrots when Stephanie (the babysitter) arrived. Stephanie had professionally trained as a baker, so she was a perfect fit for A-‘s interest. As I worked in the other room, I heard them talking about how the oil and the sugar lighten in colour with mixing, and why we grease the muffin tins. A- remembered so many steps in the process, even checking the muffins with a toothpick. Stephanie complimented A- on being a good baker. A- said, “No, I'm a cook,” which amused us.

They enjoyed the freshly baked muffins for snack, and I set out some berries and cheese too. A- asked, “Would Stephanie like so much snacks?” After snack, A- played in the play area with Stephanie. Then they went to the backyard for some digging and ball-throwing.

I managed to do a little over 2.5 hours of consulting. The rest of the time was mostly helping out, cleaning up, and getting a head start on chores. This let me use A-‘s nap time for reading (1 hour), so that probably counts too. Like before, A- fell asleep shortly after the babysitter left.

A- seems to like the novelty, and I think I'll enjoy the diversity of skills and experiences people bring. I liked being around to translate A-‘s more obscure requests and overhear the things she wanted to know more about. At the same time, I was able to focus much better on code than I used to be able to do late at night. This could work out nicely.

One afternoon a week feels like the right balance for us at the moment. I was able to think a little about consulting in between sessions, but not let it take over my brain. We were able to do a few fun field trips together. I captured lots of little moments in my journal. I should probably think of kaizen projects that would take about one hour to do, and tee those up for next week. Hmm…